Dismantling Chauvinism

#LikeAGirl

 

Chauvinism:  An attitude that members of your own sex are always better than the opposite sex.  It means you believe the opposite sex is inferior to your own, and unworthy of equal treatment.  Chauvinism is not just a guy thing; it’s a gal thing, too. 

While some men may slap hands over “score” boards and cat call women on the street, women may say that all men are idiots or malicious predators.  Both are different manifestations of the same bigotry.  Chauvinism at its heart is a distorted view of reality, which plays on our worst fears.  It's very similar to racism. 

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Post-Civil War, a war-wearied nation emerged free from the shackles of slavery, but the Jim Crow South still showed a reckless and violent disregard for people of color through institutionalized bigotry.  The races were kept completely separate – in restaurants, on buses, in schools, restrooms and drinking fountains.  While the chains of slavery had been officially broken, the underlying bigotry that fueled slavery was still deeply rooted in American culture.  There were (and there still are) remnants of distrust between the races, which in the Jim Crow days was manifested not only by overt fighting words, but more so by the cold shoulder of disinterest and disdain for our neighbor because of the color of their skin.  Racism was just “the way it was.”  Like a pot boiling over, it was just a matter of time before the deep-seeded anger surfaced.  What lay beneath soon emerged to the surface in the Civil Rights Movement, a movement where people began to walk in the liberty already guaranteed them by the U.S. Constitution.     

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Chauvinism and racism are two different creatures, but the same spirit of division fuels them both.  Like racism, chauvinism is something you feel.  People don’t have to say anything to display their attitudes toward people of a different sex.  The spirit of my attitude is on display for all to see through my words, actions or awkward interactions. 

How we view each other determines the quality of our relationships.  The bottom line is this:  Do we see each other as objects to be conquered or companions to be cherished?  How we answer that question will define the quality of not only our romantic relationships, but our platonic ones as well. 

If I see you as an object to be conquered, then it’s really not about you.  My relationship to you is only defined by what you can do for me.  I want you as long as I can use you, but then I can throw you away at will.  You become a play thing rather than a person to me.  That’s disgusting, I know, but is this happening even now?      

A cherished companion, however, is in it for the long-haul, through thick and through thin. 

  
It doesn’t matter what’s happening in life – in good times or bad times, a true friend will stick with you.  True friends don’t fizzle out when the going gets tough, but will bear your burdens and work through the hard stuff.  If I see you as a companion to be cherished, then I will role up my sleeves, wash your feet (at least metaphorically!) and lay down my life for you. (John 15:13).  That is Love.  That type of Love eschews selfish ambition and prefers you to me.    

Do you see the difference?   

One is selfish (childish/immature); the other is gracious and giving (grown up).  1 Corinthians 13:11. 

If I’m trying to objectify and conquer you, then that’s not on you; it’s bred out of my own insecurity that craves control.  Men and women, you don’t have to act tough if you are tough.  Strength speaks for itself.  We don’t have to overcompensate for our own insecurities by conquering and controlling others.

If I cherish you as a companion, then I don’t wake up in the morning wondering if you’ll still be in my life or if I need to cut and run.  I am devoted to you, no matter what.  In a relationship (friendship or otherwise) where I cherish you as my companion, I am strong.  If I cherish you, then I am being chiseled, with you, into a stronger, more durable companion as we face and overcome the challenges of life together.

Who do you want to be?

Someone who fits into the crowd, cracks crude jokes and demeans the opposite sex, or someone who, through your good deeds, puts to silence the ignorance of foolish men (and women)?  1 Peter 2:15.   

Today’s a new day.  The cease-fire in the battle of the sexes starts with us, and Love is always first to lead the way.  I may have missed it in the past, but I know which path to choose today.

but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, - See more at: http://bible.knowing-jesus.com/topics/Growing-Spiritually#sthash.qlIsKRQi.dpuf

 ...Speaking the truth in love, (we) may grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ. ~ Ephesians 4:15

PS ~ I have to laugh, because I know that some of you are disturbed by the fact that the video at the beginning of this post comes from an ad campaign sponsored by a feminine products company.  The *funny* thing is, some of you are more disturbed by that than you are by the real and latent prejudices between the sexes.  To which I say: case in point! :-)

but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, - See more at: http://bible.knowing-jesus.com/topics/Growing-Spiritually#sthash.qlIsKRQi.dpuf